say yes.

i want to say i hate this but it’s such a weak word 

and these feelings are so much stronger than the need to be concerned

with my own aversion for the situation and the way we’ve been relating 

and coexisting/fishing for what we’re missing 

in the mouths of nameless strangers

create diversions to mask uncertainty

what was once so fully worth it to me is undeserving of me

and honestly, it’s hurting me

cause jars and jars of promises sit unopened/unattended

i wish i’d known your love was bound be so open ended 

and that you’d let me let my guard down when you knew you couldn’t defend it

and all the time we spent together you were really just pretending

that someday i’d be the one you want we’d grow into each other

physically tall/emotionally small,you were looking for a mother

but i’ve got a little boy and he’s more grown than you’re capable

and the fact that you broke his heart isn’t only unforgivable it’s hateful

and despicable and evil and i don’t care about me Joe 

but when you tell him that you love him you’ve got to be for real

you’ve got to be accountable and honorable and honest and FAITHFUL

because i won’t be with a man who’s any less than what i’m able

to admire and be inspired by he’ll open my heart and open my mind’s eye 

and he won’t be defined by my presence in his life

or seek to leave his mark on me - 

unless expanding exponentially

the horizons of my mind or the ocean of my capacity

to love another person despite the circumstances 

and not only because i’m a hopeless romantic

but it’s gonna be so fucking real that i can’t even stand it

and not because he buys me things then thinks he can command it

but it will flow from a wellspring that’s never ever ending

and we’ll tell each other truths and god, that’s so refreshing

and i’ll rest easier at night knowing someone really gets me

because i’ve been waiting for so long and now i’m finally ready

and i hope you’re hungry enough to eat every last lie

and please don’t talk with your mouth full, it’s really impolite

you’ll be okay, don’t beg me to stay, you know i have to leave

i have to get out because i can barely breathe

and despite all we’ve been through, you still don’t even see

that saying no to you means saying yes to me.